Monthly Archives: October 2012

Nothing is Harder…

I am writing today with a whole new out look on life. On the things that can be considered hard.

On October 13th, 2012 at around noon my wife gave birth to our first born son, Paxton Michael Bell. He was a beautiful perfect little boy. But when he was born he was not breathing. He was taken away from us as quickly as he had arrived. My family was moved to BC Children’s Hospital and Paxton and Rebecca began receiving the most amazing care I have ever had the privilege to witness.

Over the next 2 days the doctors and specialists cared for Paxton and worked around the clock to try and determine what had happened. In the end they came to us with the most terrifying news I have ever received in my life. During the labor there was some sort of problem that prevented the umbilical chord from delivering the things it needed too him, specifically gases like Oxygen. They think it occurred somewhere in the 2nd half of the labor process and was prolonged enough that Paxton suffered an acute, sever brain event. There was no part of him that was not impacted. Our perfect boy, a perfect pregnancy for my wife, had grown just the way he should have and had everything robbed of him.

The Doctors then told us he was unlikely to survive and that they did not feel there was anything more medicine could do for him. Late Tuesday we had to take the life shattering choice to take Paxton off of vital supports to see if he had enough function to even support his vital operations. After a fight that seemed to last an eternity it was obvious he did not and he passed quietly cradled in his mothers arms. The perfect picture of an infant that never had the chance to show his true colours.

Rebecca and I love him with all our hearts after only a short time. Even though he never had a chance with us here we got to know him and his personality over the last 9 months. He has forever changed things for us. Cycling and its challenges seem small compared to what he fought against. We will miss him.
Read More