Cheating on the Bike…

The weather is turning and the bike is locked tightly into the confines of the computrainer. It seems like such a waste to see such a purely elegant machine strapped into that grotesque chastity belt. It is a beast of necessity, but it certainly reminds me every time I am on it that I am being robbed of the true pleasure of “the ride”. It suits the purpose but how does an avid cyclist fulfill himself when the pleasure of the ride is stolen away by the winds of winter…dare I seek comfort in the arms of a not so confined mistress???

This is the exact road I have traveled of late. Sure I still pay the appropriate attention to my other half. But I have lately begun to find solace in the company of another. As a cyclist I feel wrong just saying this, like I am out running around with a big scarlet letter on my chest. That is not so far from the truth. After all I have always said triathlon is the best way to ruin a perfectly good bike ride. But each step takes me closer to a precipice of hypocrisy. Running truly is a cruel mistress. I have returned now both times, heart racing, totally spent. But the euphoria soon wears off and the pain and aguish soon takes over. My legs feel as though they have been torn inside out. My biceps even got soar, what the heck; my biceps??? I mean I am no runner but how is that even physically possible?

The best thing about this whole experience is how it reminds me. It reminds me of why I am a cyclist. Why I am not a runner, or a tri-athlete. It reminds me that in spite of it all I love cycling above any other cruel training mistress that may be available. After all, cycling can usher me to more fantastic places. The bike is pure and exciting. After a ride I don’t feel as if my joints have been violated, turned inside out. I feel…at home on the bike.

Winter means we become acquainted with new activities, but ultimately I would argue that if you are a cyclist at heart, this time of year just refreshes your desire to be on the bike. So I will wait out the cold…hopefully I will be in a warmer climate or on an indoor track in the New Year. Check out my new web site…have a happy holiday.

One of the Originals…

V02 Max testing has been used for years, by all kinds of athletes, for all kinds of reasons…but what is really being tested?

Sure you come out of it with a bunch of numbers and a good indication of the kind of shape you are in for riding your bike…but for a cyclist, or for me anyway, there is a little more in it than that.

(150 Watts) you are testing yourself…on a lot of levels…your physiology is only a small part of it…your psychological strength is pushed, a lot more, a lot further…harder…this seems harder than it should be.

(200 Watts) it’s your ability to focus…un-focus…control…control your breathing…your breathing moving the valves of the alien apparatus that is perched on the top of your head…like one of those old hard shell Bell helmets (you know the ones with the flip up logo for added ventilation)…valves open, close…vents, chambers…your heart…wow!! your heart rate is low but you are breathing heavy….

(250 Watts) maybe you just need to relax…relax…I feel tight…just relax and breath… this isn’t so bad I guess…it’s sort of like racing only without the fun…racing is fun, especially when you can really move…move…move your legs…keep it moving.

(300Watts) It’s not like you’re moving…but you are pushing…it has the same kind of rhythm as the first few anxious minutes of a break…anxious minutes left…anxiety…my heart rate is coming up…this is getting a little tough…tough…you gotta be tough…it is only going to get worse…worse or….

(350 Watts) better…it’s a journey that makes you better…stronger…I feel stronger…stronger than last time…stronger than ever…this is taking forever…but you keep going…keep pushing and racing…to beat yourself…your toughest competition…

(400 Watts) It’s a test that pushes you to the pinnacle of your strength…it is a test because it tests you…what are you capable of…what are other people capable of…it’s like a race…and now its go time…it’s getting tough…winding up…up the tempo …

(450 Watts) this is the tempo…hard…hard to hold…hard to push…hard to pass…pass out…out cold…maybe I would rather be out in the numb cold…my hands are cold, numb like pins and needles…

(500 Watts) the cold…I start to feel like an anti-cold…hard to catch but everyone’s trying…this is it, this is for the racing…you get through this, you win the race…against your opponents…against yourself…this is the best part…the pain…the pain everyone else must be feeling…feeling only in the legs…none in the hands…it’s out of my hands…it’s all the head now…

(550) The head is hot and cold…harder…it’s harder…I am slowing down…I need to go faster…faster…faster… … … …this made me faster…more pain in the bank…to be saved up and redistributed to competitors later in the friendly exchange of gifts called a bike race.